@taijitu_sees
Grasping the ineffable. My wife and three kids are everything to me.
š Joined: 10/14/2022
šļø Archived: 11/17/2024
17.7K Tweets
744 Followers
398 Following
53.4K Likes
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@visualbasic97 My mom ran a daycare and took on a special needs kid. He tried to lure my sister into an unsupervised area to play doctor. Likely knew what he was doing was wrong, but had no impulse control. I've always wondered how much was people expecting/accepting his bad behavior.
@OneEyedAlpaca OMG. One of my worst dates was this girl that asked an hour before the date if her friend could tag along. Sure, double date, score! Friend was ugly/fat/dumb and did everything possible to sabotage her codependent friend. š
@FriedKielbasa Industrialization. Children become viewed as costs instead of benefit. Children start being a net gain for labor around 5yo pre industrialization. Post they are a drain until 20+
@mingyusgirlfr @visualbasic97 He was a teen. Was an after school thing. Also watched his younger sister.
@JoshuaLisec Most people can't imagine this level of coercion and what can happen. I can. My wife's family escaped that situation and the stories sound unbelievable except that when you talk to others that went through it, you realize they were hardly remarkable stories.
@JoshuaLisec Along the way, people were starving so bad they didn't question mystery meat with human fingernails in it. Eventually he swam to HK and stole a boat to rescue his family. Heroic to go back into that hell.
@verymoisturized Real. Such a bubble working with other engineers. Spending a couple hours at the emergency room pops that bubble hard.
@JoshuaLisec Father in law saw his dad beaten to death by government officials when they came to seize his estate. He was then forced into labor on a farm. Didn't know what to do so played with livestock as they died from negligence. Then he ended up in prison for a bit.
@mingyusgirlfr @visualbasic97 Their kids got out of school before the parents work was over so they needed someone to watch them for a few hours after school. My mom was looking for ways to make money while staying home.
@motherpilled Wife is about to complain she can't go anywhere on account of me holding her feet.
@thinkingwest Fragmented culture.
@KustosSapyenshy @realfemsapien For women, 10-15% is dipping into the essential fat range. Not healthy for long periods of time. 20% for female athletes is reasonable. For males, yeah that's overweight. Especially if you want to maximize pullups š
@VividVoid_ So much of my anger towards my wife was just some twisted sense of love. Cared too much how I thought I was being interpreted by her because it hurt my perception of self that I cared about her. Nasty paradox to untangle. Required a light touch.
@TheEcho13 Women like stability and confidence. Complaining looks like a lack of both. Yes, there are massive problems in the dating economy. No, fixing others is never the answer. Fixing yourself however, often fixes others by being a good model.
@L0m3z The polarity in the fitness of Costco shoppers is astounding. Either massively overweight or fit. Hardly any middle ground. Tempted to volunteer as the door checker just to see if it's actually a bimodal distribution.
@shawntifying You failed to make Belgian waffles If you didn't fold meringue into the batter. Authentic pozole should be illegal. Ube is a color not a flavor.
@adrusi Reminds me of every time I tried to do the right thing and immediately go to the authorities. School taught me to not trust the authorities.
@eigenrobot See, the trick is finding a short wife that's only short due to nutritional deficiencies so that you get that big oomph from introducing the kids to a chad diet.
@verysillybestie @VividVoid_ @prodigygrimes Fun paradox most people don't quite get is that violence can be prosocial.
@skooookum Wife came to me today and was: I need my hands warmed up. WTF your whole body is just cold, I thought you were supposed to be warm! Uhh you harvested all my warmth with your feet this morning. š
@hermittoday Uuhhhh I've already done it in my mind you hear! One of my most intelligent friends in college ended up not graduating due to being lazy and having an enormous ego.
@caesararum @oteycoueye Arguments for and against hatchery fish are interesting. Main argument against is that the fish are too mono cultured and weaken natives. But the pro is that native salmon have less pressure on them. I'd agree lab grown would reduce human incentives to protect salmon.
@webdevMason I remember seeing the difference in mothers between two goats that lost a kid. One refused to move from where be buried her baby for over a week and the other didn't even seem to notice. Also saw a cow give birth and it was amazing all the stuff that just happened.
@cranklloydwrong @shawntifying Cannibalism https://t.co/dn7VAkg56a
@meaning_enjoyer It's probably more robust philosophically to not take truth so seriously. Classic Chinese didn't even have a close lexical word for it. https://t.co/yascZlgn8f
Crazy how damaging intentionally removing yourself from your culture is. Sure way to burn bridges with family.
@VividVoid_ Greatest part about shadow work isn't that it's something to banish, but something to acknowledge and channel productivity.
@leahprime Only took 6 months for me. I floated the idea of "trial period" she was lmfao no, I already tried that with a guy for 7 years and he was a loser I got stuck with. Oh, so you're responsible and will try everything to make it work. Cool, let's marry.
@verymoisturized I asked my wife to do this and felt silly asking after she explained this She wasted 7 years with a useless guy doing this Realized she was responsible, I committed to marriage after 6 months.
@DelendaEast Getting there. Have yet to be buried together.
@forthrighter A PDF religion needs to be founded to muddle the search results further! All hail the great Adobe!
@OVOAugustus Got into callestenics after marriage. Became muscular. Was like 150lbs and now 180lbs. I'm not trying to get attention from other women, but they look at me differently. Muscles are just a side effect of working out. Emotional regulation benefits have primacy. Good first step.
@breaking2morrow @OneEyedAlpaca Funniest thing is it only looks like a snap but it's the result of hundreds of micro transgressions that were unnoticed before tripping the threshold.
@tkddroid LDS heaven is indeed one of the better heaven ideas and I love how systemized the religion is. LDS members tend to be really great people and I love their culture.
I'm liberal and got spooked by leftist authoritarians in college. As it got worse, I felt pushed out. My family is liberal and not open to talking about problems. Extended family are conservative and I often disagree with them, but can talk and explore things. https://t.co/Ri2GXaC63Q
Gifted kids are tricky. Teetering on the edge of falling into a low perspective hell pit. They need someone in their lives that can challenge them in a way they can respect. A pessimistic part of me thinks people unconsciously call gifted kids smart just to destroy them. Being told they're smart has a number of bad effects. For one they think their perspective is the best significantly cutting off information they could be processing. Also they become fragile to trying new things because failure results in attacking their identity. Better to make hard working their identity. How would you feel if 80% of the people you encountered took 10x times as long to understand something as you? Would probably be frustrating and feel easier to just ignore them. Especially as a young child with low impulse control and patience. What many are labeling "narcissism" is just low patience and lack of trust. It's critical gifted children are fostered with patience, hard working, and satisfaction from helping pull others up to where they're at. It's critical non gifted people can recognize the gifted and not have their ego challenged and react in narcissistic ways dragging everyone down.
@kitten_beloved My Chinese immigrant mother in law in California is partying over it. She's hardly even political. It's quite something to see.
@mingyusgirlfr @jenny_gxo @visualbasic97 Was living in the countryside at the time and those programs are fairly limited due to the large distances. My wife grew up in a city and has these programs available.
@hopeworldrising @prince_of_fakes Ironically, this is a single best Orifice advertisement I've seen.
@ghost_purr @visualbasic97 They were just watched in our own home. Typically was only a couple extra kids. We were watching the sister and the brother had issues at a previous care provider so mom tried to do a favor watching him as well.
@nosilverv Those points are emotional, whatever they hear most often, and what they focus on. Rationality has little to nothing to do with belief.
@samswoora Sometimes I'd just dead ass say "no." and look at the horror on their face. Hate the music questions because typically they're just trying to figure out what tribe you're in and don't understand music as a mood setting tool or even that it's expressive.
@endofanerajc @prince_of_fakes I'm married, have three children. This is less painful than modern dating even if it cost 10k. Sad and true.
Type of guy that realized free will didn't exist and it was all deterministic. So he looked at the inputs and outputs and did more inputs to get the outputs he wanted.
Red tribe tends to be brakes and it's important to have periods of progress and growth followed by periods of pulling back. Much of the government has metastisized overgrowing its bounds for decades and never got scaled back. Team brakes has the best chance to prune back this overgrowth. 90% of the social progress we've had won't be going away. Red tribe at its core is more non interference after blue tribe hemorrhaged members upending its traditional values such as freedom of speech. It's just part of the ebb flow process to balance things.
Listening is a fucking super power and nobody seems to fully realize this. I'm not talking about just hearing, I'm talking about understanding. š§µ
@IkkyusDen Contextually, these writings came out of a brutal chaotic warfare era so the focus was on instructing the sage kings to not break society again, though inevitable. The value here is even more abstract for the common person who doesn't see themselves as a king.
@ItIsHoeMath I've been aware of this doom for about a decade. Half of which I was fortunate enough to start a family in. A seed of hope to replant this barren world. Nearly everything wants to destroy this sprout. It's worth everything to protect and nurture.
It takes the capacity for plan B to have peace. Fun paradox. https://t.co/Wt7IbxTBO7
Being aligned with nature isn't taking the path of least resistance. Especially when it's obvious. It's the ineffable we're grasping here right? The ineffable isn't obvious. https://t.co/cfWedVh6JN
If you're a family poster, drop something about your family in the comments, I'd love to follow you, share in our wins/losses or general experience. https://t.co/NlKUpaS2AX
@XVanFleet @KerryKennedyRFK My wife's family escaped China swimming to HK Wife used to think her dad just exaggerated things until talking to others with similar experiences. Her mom was starving and emaciated in the arrival to HK photos. https://t.co/d9SHgoAKsE
@algekalipso I get icepick headaches a few times a year but they're gone in about 10 seconds. No clue what I'd do if they lasted an hour. I'd still like to never experience them again. Once they came with an migraine aura and I thought I was dying or something as my vision flickered.
@DanWuori Ahhh another good one. There's a few schemas going on here. Previously they mounded the top with all their clean clothes which annoyed my wife. https://t.co/kgJAEhKr7c
@goblinodds My most successful dating profile was just me ranting about how much of a spoon bigot I was and how I bought spoons from flea markets just to reforge them into the divine instrument the fork. Got people to laugh and they'd message just to see if I was crazy.
Doable in 3 months with high bandwidth connection, good faith openness with intent/focus. Impression management tends to fall off after a month. Don't discount the initial impression management phase as "fake". They're often living to the ideals they'd like to get to. Direction, not magnitude. Afterwards, you'll have to determine if they're trying to build a bridge over a small stream, river, bay, or to the moon. If they're going somewhere impossible, best not to follow. One of the biggest things you'll need to sort out first and make take longer is what are your values and goals, how do they align with your partner? How much should you adapt for them? In the end, you're both going to be building an infinite bridge together. Understand what it means to be aligned and what you're providing each other. The hardest part is sorting out liars. Don't lie to others and especially not yourself. Do not tolerate lies. You can count more on behavior than words. If their words and behavior are incoherent with each other, this should raise red flags. Don't make excuses for them. My wife was strung along for 7 years by her ex. She understood early it wasn't going to work out but she kept putting in effort. We figured each other out enough for marriage in about 4 months. Plenty of ups and downs but we're aligned on vision and goals more than ever these past 6 years.
If I don't catch this in time it just fades away https://t.co/k0vBROBJ0d
@vv_enaa @cranklloydwrong @shawntifying When I was first introduced to it I wanted to see how authentic I could make it. Not very apparently.
@prerationalist Seems like it would be a good idea, but tracking people would be hard. People would probably just go in a bunch, or have family go in and buy, then resell. Would like to see a solution that's not just things cost what people can pay.
Husbands should serve their wives. Wifes should submit to their husbands. The average ego simply cannot handle this. https://t.co/CPXtihGr9d
@whatifalthist China. Cultural revolution right after another revolution was an extinction event. I'm not sure anything of this scale was attempted anywhere else. Now most of the culture there is made up.
@derbydefi In highschool I had a short teacher. One segment we could play any song we wanted that accompanied an essay/speech. This troll picked "Short People" by Randy Newman. It was cut off pretty quickly š«£
@anpaure As far as SW dev jobs, video game intern is about as far down the bottom of the barrel possible. Apparently my old college is trying to talk students out of working at video game companies š
@alicemazzy It's funny if I take my Chinese MIL shopping at a western market she's like WTF would I do with any of these exotic produce. Where's my gailan and choisum? Take me to the Asian market!
Perfect mirror. Hardly a ripple even. https://t.co/OyuBIO8b2X
@aki_thinker @drethelin There's quite a few import controls on potentially invasive animals. Several aquarium fish I'm not allowed to have because they're wreck the local ecosystem. This guy wanted to hunt them so I'm guessing the risk of them being released is the issue here.
I've been a little too serious lately. Respond and I'll assign you a fish based on your personality.
@goblinodds Ahhh that fine line between a human being and doing. Doing wins every time, even when doing fails. Sometimes especially in failure. Doing for another bootstraps reciprocity getting that generative relationship loop going.
I used to think family was just abuse. Both my parents had abusive broken family backgrounds passing on a milder version to me. I have 3 children now untangling most of my issues. @calistan_ and @baoteching asked about it so I'll go into more details. https://t.co/7HDaq2DsC7
Haven't watched anything on TV for about 5 months. Baby makes it hard, but lately I've loved just interacting and writing on here. Love all of you so much! Thanks!
@jimfanara @TylerAlterman It's like Gu poison where you put a bunch of venomous critters in a urn and the most dangerous survives, but with fighting styles. š https://t.co/cV4llTwArW
So you think you can't grasp the Dao?I'm here to give you the awareness that you have already grasped it. But, bro it's ineffable! You might protest. My brother in Dao, everything is ineffable! š§µ
@goblinodds I was on the lake this week and saw several bored wives sitting on boats likely just so the husband could use two more rods and double his limit. š Fish are gross and slimy. Wife likes eating fish and is proud when I catch things and get to have Cantonese streamed fish. https://t.co/1hb6mRehQo
This chapter is a bit of a criticism of Confucianism highlighting that it's coercive action through ridgid order ultimately hurts people. Wu Wei, or non-coercive action is indirectly highlighted here. Sages don't really know what others experience so how can they really tell people what to do and expect to know better? If you force people into morality, they're not really being moral right? If people are fair with each other and don't cheat each other people won't feel entitled to steal. This translation feels a little weird. I prefer to see the original key terms so I can glossary reference them.
https://t.co/wqcGGiZXUn https://t.co/CcL6MAUq1N
Chaos synthesis for resilience vs Order shelterimg for dependence https://t.co/FX4yVjQSth
@IkkyusDen I'm always trying to thread this. Machiavellianism is impartial and systemized but love is an integrated perspective. Recognize everyone is going about their roles and playing their part and to love them for that. Even the assholes have value to cherish while protecting against.
Me and who? My wife. That's who. Happy anniversary at that. May we have many more bear slayings in the future. https://t.co/ZqpBsHTjiC
@IkkyusDen We all have positions of lordship/power in our relationships with others.
@emilykmay I'm a fish keeper. He did the best he could on short notice, but there's a fair amount to improve on. Fish keeping is complicated and there's much to take in and I've made numerous mistakes and still make them.
Met a 3yo that could read fluently. Tried to stump him on big words like "hypnogogic". Wasn't stumped. Incredibly curious and amazing to talk with. Fast forward a few years and now he just talks to me about Pokemon. Sad his brain is now imprisoned in a second order simulation.
@fluxtheorist Add a couple infants/toddlers that come with enough sleep deprivation and it'll go down a bit. Nature has a way of working these things out.
@MaryJackalope I always thought the first three months was a slog due to sleep deprivation. But it's fairly easy with no complicated demands. Toddlers with limited language and complicated demands though š
Important to remember the ego isn't just something that needs to be deleted. It gives you the force to proceed. Sometimes it's just going in the counterproductive direction and needs to be pulled back for a bit of reorienting. https://t.co/tmrBYe2g7t
@GeorgePunished @seconds_0 @goblinodds Guy on the left is a fly fisherman. Fit, artful, skillful, peaceful, thoughtful. Right guy is a bass bro. Big boy, cruises around on clunky expensive flat-bottomed boat. Probably exposed to too much mercury, PCB, micro plastics. Caveman levels of sophistication.
@IkkyusDen Our capacity to solve and make problems increases. Chaotic eras are periods of creative discovery while painful lead to stability after new patterns are discovered. Everything is ordered on the three act primordial story of stability to chaos to new stability. Framing fixes.
Dissolved sense of self first time today. This is how we all feel? Don't even know who is crying. This is ineffable!
Christians, what's your attitude towards Buddhism and other Eastern religious traditions?
Incentives are coercive. Took me awhile to figure that out. The main issue is you're creating a parallel abstract world that's incoherent and ultimately breaks down into some cobra effect. You can't beat natural incentives. https://t.co/WspfiBcWAY
Reminder that when you learn a skill, you find new trouble. Which makes you learn another skill to keep the whole thing going. https://t.co/4dLSAGtsZm
@goblinodds Biggest catalyst for me was becoming fascinated with listening. Picked up on female interest better. Could tell how well they listened. It's the base skill for relationships to continuously be improved too. Understanding people is interacting with the ineffable. It's a miracle.
@prince_of_fakes "has a quiet mode" š It can be so frustrating reading something complicated when my wife wants to talk about something obvious. I'm trying to read about Daoist cosmology, I don't care about what brands of instant noodles have the best texture right now.
Made beef Wellington for anniversary. Must have folded puff pastry one too many times. Not so puffy. 3^6 way smaller than 3^7 š I'll practice puff pastry more š„ https://t.co/JxpN0TX6vE
What do you see? Brainless Buddhist: this cup should be more empty. Christcuck: this cup should be more full of Jesus. Deranged Daoist: this cup is balanced. https://t.co/TZq0zgJzJU
It's such a relief when you realize how stupid you are.
Feels low key illegal being able to buy 50lbs of pure flavor like this. https://t.co/aXdSkO8Zym
4yo: that girl is pretty (referring to our server) Then tell her! 4yo: I'm shy...
Daoism has done weird stuff to my brain in these 3 short years. Asked Claude to figure out my worldview with the following prompt: "I would like you to ask me questions to determine what my framework is for my world view." After I felt like it got enough, asked it to evaluate what philosophy or religion matched best. Listed: Daoism, Buddhism (Zen), Systems Theory/Cybernetics, Ken Wilber's Integral Theory, Complexity Science/Chaos Theory. Feels about right. Wish AI was around to do a "this was my brain before DDJ" snapshot. I know I had a different framework before, but I'm not sure what it was. Maybe I'd describe it as overly rationalized? I suspect my worldview will continuously change over time but things have never made more sense to me as they do right now. Just feels weirdly extra dimensional and can't imagine not seeing the world like this.
4yo just figured out how to write "love". Now she's written it on a whole pad of sticky notes. Love is everywhere. Good reminder.
@goblinodds I like weighing in when I can. Hate seeing people struggle with dating and understand how broken the dating economy is. Marriage improved my life more than I ever expected.