Doable in 3 months with high bandwidth connection, good faith openness with intent/focus. Impression management tends to fall off after a month. Don't discount the initial impression management phase as "fake". They're often living to the ideals they'd like to get to. Direction, not magnitude. Afterwards, you'll have to determine if they're trying to build a bridge over a small stream, river, bay, or to the moon. If they're going somewhere impossible, best not to follow. One of the biggest things you'll need to sort out first and make take longer is what are your values and goals, how do they align with your partner? How much should you adapt for them? In the end, you're both going to be building an infinite bridge together. Understand what it means to be aligned and what you're providing each other. The hardest part is sorting out liars. Don't lie to others and especially not yourself. Do not tolerate lies. You can count more on behavior than words. If their words and behavior are incoherent with each other, this should raise red flags. Don't make excuses for them. My wife was strung along for 7 years by her ex. She understood early it wasn't going to work out but she kept putting in effort. We figured each other out enough for marriage in about 4 months. Plenty of ups and downs but we're aligned on vision and goals more than ever these past 6 years.