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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Ways in which I developed a sense of self in 2020/21 🧵

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

People-pleasing Realising I myself am one of the people to cater to. https://t.co/G2LCvOFdtT

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

I am one of the people to cater towards to. https://t.co/8A8v37Li79

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Becoming a real person https://t.co/5vURr6xNNe

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

I seemed to not exist in the in-between parts where I wasn’t talking to people, and when I was, I felt constructed and fake.

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Finding it enough to be my own audience https://t.co/JbUFOVeBeg

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

I worked really hard to have saying thoughts to myself feel enough. What needs to be said out loud? Do I retain the audience of myself? https://t.co/x7CGsRFwhm

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Finding my sense of what I wanna do https://t.co/NMplunl2P5

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

Every day, I just asked myself ‘hey what do u wanna do rn?’ And I am privileged and lucky enough to be able to do whatever the answer is. And over time | didn’t have to ask anymore. My body just told me https://t.co/uswDwgrgj5

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Being at the beach by myself is a real experience https://t.co/iUSBc5RXA1

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

I never thought I could look at a day by the beach myself And find it peaceful What is this This walking around with wholeness Disorienting still

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

A satisfaction only I can see is a real experience https://t.co/KofajobFL4

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

Tonight, walking at 3am, I possess a satisfaction that can neither be shared, nor preserved, only practiced.

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

I already exist, and my actions already matter https://t.co/OdbigHzaTw

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

Does posting this have an oomph to it? Not quite. It’s starting to. This is already real. I feel I have waited all my life for this moment to step inside the house as people say, “Welcome.” Welcome to a world that feels real, and experiences and actions have that oomph to them

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Finding my sense of self as a team https://t.co/y5tPOtTGyK

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

It feels like I “discovered” a self I “count on” / a self I fundamentally trust, not that it will always know what’s right, but that it’s part of my team, and so its decision are simply as my own. I use “we” like @eiritana. What the fuck is going on.

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Realising my needs were real https://t.co/7nVWLupHRg

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

I can be with myself. I can take my own needs seriously. I was so embarassed to / didn’t have the idea to take my own needs seriously and kindly, but I can. https://t.co/OvkrXMGpTF

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

The switch is flipped, treating myself as a human being https://t.co/qAfPoMs42V

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

You are done with life. Whatever it is you needed to do to earn your place here, you have done it. Now it is just survival and thriving and helping.

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Becoming less of a Rules person and more of a person https://t.co/4unaZR4rgN

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

The idea that there is a correct way to do this moment is sign of being a Rules person. https://t.co/FQCulLcEaC

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7/27/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

holy shit [🤯] just found this too finding a desire to change for yourself, in a way that may not be seen by others stopping trying to fool the therapist https://t.co/6Ni1HVwhtc

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

One must experience a desire firstly to no longer fool the therapist but to truly want change. This is easier said than done. Most of us have no reference points for what that would even look like.

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8/5/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 4 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

Not me, but here’s an empty, loser, idiot prankster guy coming face to face with something, for the first time in his life, he might consider as real. That’s something. https://t.co/XDXRK4A0IV

Visakan Veerasamy@visakanv• over 6 years ago

He choked on his words; whatever he was trying to say. He tried to laugh it off, and stumbled out of there. And someone wrote a really thoughtful comment about the whole thing – about how, in that moment, maybe he realized for the first time, properly, that other people are real

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10/19/2021

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

new year, new thread https://t.co/cb0qrsC9zG

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

Ways in which I’m finding a sense of self in 2021/22 🧵 https://t.co/8GaAOT3pOq

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1/17/2022

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

there’s more important reasons im splitting the thread than just the new year. just feels like an immense break. something about hitting and exiting a stable sense of completion

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1/17/2022

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

this thread felt more about escaping the Rules mindset. + discovering how to be with myself new thread feels more about relearning friendship and discovering being with people

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1/17/2022

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

being seen https://t.co/XJkvusKdpF

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

Let yourself be seen. There is no time to not let other people find you. https://t.co/by9b6kmdbM

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1/17/2022

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

allowing judgment https://t.co/ebRYZWj3UN

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

One of the most powerful pieces of advice I ever received: Allow judgment.

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1/17/2022

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

holding my form https://t.co/O6xZMDQ7Dj

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 4 years ago

I feel the rightness of attention, the rightness of my judgment, the incisive shape of my will. What I stand for, the things I want to do, the values I hold. Form, as a human being. https://t.co/6gSknAL9QS

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4/16/2022