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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

Repeat: I AM NOT A HAPPY FUCKING MAMMAL IN THAT ROOM Shit.

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

It’s so simple. I wondered why I didn’t want to work in there. I wanted to. The work appealed. But mammal me doesn’t give a fuck. Mammal me is me.

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

I have died enough that I just can’t ignore the mammal me anymore so happy to be alive and to be moving and swinging and sighing and flirting. https://t.co/0stM5G2xol

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

I feel done with life. I have nothing left to do. I made it, I don't mind continuing to exist, it’s pleasant, but . . . if it ended here, it would feel complete. 1. Have you felt this way? 2. When / what happens for you now?

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

Mammal me feels big. Sensate pleasure feels big. Thoughts feel smaller than they used to. https://t.co/lVTEQKBuw0

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

Looking back at my texts . . . it strikes me the kind of things I used to worry about would have been huge things like my life and ambition and emotional well-being. Now what concerns me is how my shoulders are doing. Sensate pleasure is big, and thoughts feel small. https://t.co/CRo9Qr3x1f

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

I don’t wanna work in that room because mammal me just doesn’t feel happy there. Of course I hate it. And as soon as I say that, it comes alive all the things I can do to make that room a happy mammal place.

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

Jumping, the right lighting, the gift @AbhayPrasanna gave me, just being. https://t.co/NfhYJZ9FDf

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

I wished a wish I did not expect to come true. Fortunately the universe is not as silly as me and gifted it anyway. “who says you can’t give yourself a back massage bb” 💆🏾‍♂️🤎 my desi love @AbhayPrasanna https://t.co/FUEiqv0S2V https://t.co/BxVHak6fau

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

Discipline is good. Discipline = the ability to not need a particular mental state to get something done. But it isn’t discipline I had to learn. It was wanting. And from wanting—just being. https://t.co/jADZDMVsFE

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

Every day, I just asked myself ‘hey what do u wanna do rn?’ And I am privileged and lucky enough to be able to do whatever the answer is. And over time | didn’t have to ask anymore. My body just told me https://t.co/uswDwgrgj5

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

Inspired by @MilanGriffes, who told me on a Zoom call today he saw the zoomed-out awareness part of me and the real solid mammal me just thrilled to be alive.

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

It’s not so much the “rider on the elephant”—gosh—trying to control where the elephant went or ride the stallion better. It’s reshaping really fundamental ideas at the toppest levels about what living can mean.

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

When it doesn’t matter, the size and scale invented by our minds (“pain in lower back” is a small thing, “50k reads” is a big thing) becomes decentered. There is a restoration of the bigness of immediacy. Of the glass next to where SWIM is tweeting from. https://t.co/NZmAb28Ixd

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago

why am i so productive in the shower , , , thoughts pls ,, 😩🚿

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2/19/2021
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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

So much of my progress was letting things be separate. My mammal body happiness is different from my mental "how is my life going" state. Just gotta both - dance it out to feel happy mammal me - tend to what needs to be done They’re just different. https://t.co/f0COPSwc74

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 5 years ago

@made_in_cosmos self-love literally solved zero of my problems liminality literally solved zero of my problems i still had to solve them but it’s sweet to have self-love and liminality there they just don’t mean solving thing just stays the same

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4/18/2021