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anyway, this is on my mind because romantic intimacy has always been hard for me, and still is. people always say, intimacy with parents and romantic partners is the final boss. well, i love my parents now, unironically and simply, but it's still hard with romance https://t.co/4QArkY4pQs

there's like, a single move, and it's something like extending compassion to myself for what im feeling. feeling awful? compassion. feeling clingy? compassion. feeling frozen? you're not going to believe it but https://t.co/9QUB5eHk50

feeling predatory? well, 1. check for harm, maybe back off, but 2. -compassion https://t.co/IjIA5SQHsI

the thing about that move, though, is not's the same move every time. because every present is so radically different, that move feels entirely different. and what the most expedient way to be with the present changes, it's never the actual same move https://t.co/F42fYYr184

you don't know what the next moment will need of you because it hasn't happened yet https://t.co/UkgPu3cBVc