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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

the trade offer of codependency is you give up access i give up access to to your inner private life my inner private life 🤝 we feel vaguely and in control of our connection with each other

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

narcissism is living within and presenting a false self. with people who have been adapted to do that since a young age, 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘦, there is no great loss in this trade offer

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

in return, you gain the security of a relationship where you can mutually enable a semi-false self in each other, a self that can only withstand feeling things that wouldn’t threaten the relationship

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘦

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

the thing that breaks my heart the most is remembering the futility of the child https://t.co/ajvUsd5BOb

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

this is what learned helplessness means. learned futility you reach out so many times without finding anything there that you stop trying

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

when i say existence, i mean knowing yourself as real. i mean knowing your emotions as real. i mean having ground https://t.co/pyGkdU9DBC

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

if you suffered a formative lack of mirroring, you seek mirroring over and over again as a confirmation of your existence

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

the feelings might leak in, show up confusing volatile ways, but ultimately your connection to self, to 𝘦𝘹𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, to knowing your feelings are real, is more really and viscerally routed through someone else your body sensibly does not give that up.

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

existence is middlemanned, limited through the bandwidth of what you can get mirrored through others, and you can spend a lifetime hopping between people, trying to get the thing https://t.co/15uFUB1GYg

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

but the point isn’t to remain middlemanned to intimacy with yourself through this person forever https://t.co/Ox9Pz4zgrq

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

the thing that literally no one else can or wants to spend a full-time job doing for you unless they don’t know how to do it for themselves too, and need someone else to do it for them (existence) https://t.co/dRXbSzzzZx

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

sometimes he met people who wanted to hold it and give him theirs. but that was rare, and it ended quickly

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

giving up codependency begins with self-existence https://t.co/wSCkyGzs1T

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

try to feel the root of the truth, rooted in the witnessing of your existence, and experience what truth is like, the fact that it exists, before speaking it https://t.co/oAzbi1Oms6

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

keywords: because your body won’t let you feel the feelings otherwise

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• almost 3 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

keywords: because feeling your real feelings was futile, trade offer

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