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there are parts of my process or my practice or w/e you wanna call it that are actually pretty important but idk how to talk about them. one is a move that is like âallowing the body to do what it wantsâ and thatâs where all the shaking and hyperventilating come from
i learned how to do this fairly suddenly, iirc around 2018 and inspired by impro but i might be misremembering, and actually trotted it out as a party trick a few times b/c the results were so funny to me. shaking, almost-crying, insane laughing. i have no idea how to teach it
also i recognize now that there are safety considerations around this sort of practice. in some people it could surface emotional and/or trauma material that isnât ready to be looked at yet. so uh youâve been warned. needs to be paired with some kind of grounding?
nevertheless it has actually been important for me, in the background as a muscle i have access to and donât need to think about much anymore. thereâs a lot of subtle things like this i think, tricky to talk about or teach, that some people donât need and others desperately do
finally this tweet is topical again, itâs been awhile old friend https://t.co/B0K1FDTR5m
funnily enough it is impossible for me to go straight to crying using just âallowingâ and nothing else even if i am very sad, i have no idea why. the tears donât quite come unless i either name some feelings or wail loudly, depending. both is even better
lol someone just reminded me what the actual origin story is, i learned how to do this from a practice a tantra guy suggested to me of masturbating without orgasm every day. sexual energy kept building up until it was unbearable and i could âreleaseâ it into shaking https://t.co/7alu8fLoWa
i learned how to do this fairly suddenly, iirc around 2018 and inspired by impro but i might be misremembering, and actually trotted it out as a party trick a few times b/c the results were so funny to me. shaking, almost-crying, insane laughing. i have no idea how to teach it
another modality that calls it "discharging," that's a pretty good name too. and this chart is *so* interesting. i get laughter a lot so seeing that it can indicate boredom, light anger, or light fear is... interesting đ https://t.co/kDDTU2F8qt
followup thread about the sexual practice https://t.co/kvMW8xTv0r
also wow the co-counseling link above has some good stuff, here's a few choice quotes. interesting claim here that "discharges" happen in a specific order: grief (tears), then fears (trembling, shivering, laughter), anger (loud words, movement), boredom (talking, laughter) https://t.co/Qley3DOOKf
@QiaochuYuan I think I learned this though a combination of processing the "sit fucking still" trauma, getting into a safe place to let my body release, and doing enough acid to re-teach myself how to stim after it had been beaten out of me.