🧵 View Thread
🧵 Thread (18 tweets)
1. Little things things like stopping to check . . . “Babe are you cold? no srsly, let’s stop, pull out the jacket, and get you warm” https://t.co/apm6RQbgpD
2. A healthy, not-entire-about-work relationship with yourself. Would you spend time with yourself if all ‘yourself’ did was nag at you about all the work you haven’t done? It’s like quality time, but for yourself. https://t.co/8ni7EC1NMM
3. Creating little moments of delight that could not be for anyone possibly but you. https://t.co/pvR2ncNC6i
To care, then, is the fundamental currency of intimacy. To afford attention and value on my partner’s needs it to make them real to herself. To provide that care and attention to our own is powerful indeed. https://t.co/fJHsxK7o9L
What is beautiful about dating myself is I still date others, but fundamentally, I am dating myself. I can very close with them, and still poly, because I am also dating myself. The multiple engines of attention and intimacy for myself run. https://t.co/NYbjFUAFRD
I felt so unreal prior to this. It is difficult to express. I existed in two states: by myself, where things didn’t feel totally real, and around others, when I felt like chameleon. Now, I totally, completely exist, even when I am alone. https://t.co/fXUWETtjCy
Dating myself still CAN mean buying myself flowers, and going to restuarants by myself. I do both, actually. https://t.co/JZyUPep0A3
I just want to point a finger away, from these mass media images of self-care and self-love, that I know felt performative to me, that I know had to tweak, for them to make sense to me. https://t.co/0zL4QjdJzR
💀 societal broke: drill into kids: they better work hard → to be “good” 🦄 liberal woke: tell traumatised adults they have “inherent worth” → so they can be loved ✨ meaningness bespoke: dismantle learned emotional schemas to love yourself because you f’ing want to
What’s wrong with those pop culture images is just that they are crude. They are breaking through the popular mentality and models, but still fixated on these symbols, flowers and dates, and miss perhaps the essence, which was always intimacy and care.
Self-love can be a frustrating frame. It really just is . . . tenderness. Or acceptance. https://t.co/5EwKiIzG1X
Dating yourself makes so many things obvious. One of those things is this: https://t.co/0IoJL3KNsg
4. Letting my internal bf do things for me no idea how this work. ill lyk when i figure it out https://t.co/tNMaXVWRpu
when im feeling v tired, and i know i should take my contacts out and take a nap but am just too tired too, i can often have my “internal bestie” be like “omg yatharth!! your so tired! let me go take your contacts off for you and get you to bed” this makes no fucking sense to me
uh oh, tweet got accidentally deleted, here it is again https://t.co/JjEWipFLJt https://t.co/1CqGxaAmMP
@not_a_hot_girl oh, i spent a whole year on it 1. finding the most self-real person i knew and hanging with her 2. taking walks by myself 3. talking to trees, etc 4. learning to make arbitrary choices about which way to walk, what clothes to wear, etc (connection to body) https://t.co/L5tWbMfNzs