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A model: There exist two multifarious, mutually opposite and mutually complementary ways of being. Let us say that they are 'divine': greater than us; inherently worthy; indefatigable. They are spirits to be possessed by; forces to channel. (Epistemic status: vibing.)

We may call them anything. A and B. 1 and 2. Bouba and Kiki. Choose whichever names you like. Regardless of your sex and gender, you are encouraged to inhabit either spirit; or even both, if you want. But let us nonetheless call them the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine.

They are wholly complementary; the world -- and to some extent, I suspect, any person, though I am not confident here -- would be incomplete in some sense if either were lacking. They balance each other; they need each other. Here I give my own inexpert interpretation of them.

Again, I want to stress that masculine != men, and feminine != women. I do occasionally use this framework to understand the genders, but I aim not to be normative, not even to describe. Most people inhabit both forces, to different extents, at different times.

This model contradicts itself in many places. Qualities that seem masculine from one angle, seem feminine from another, and vice versa. And nowadays, many gender dynamics are in flux, and many conclusions will seem, and be, false. So it goes. Then, without further ado...

The Masculine controls others through violence: "Do this, and I will hurt you." Its weakness is that its power enforces responsibility. The Feminine controls others through victimhood: "Do this, and you will hurt me." Its weakness is that its lack of agency robs it of freedom.

The Masculine uses its own desires as the basis for its actions; it hereby risks caring too little about others, and may harm others. The Feminine uses the desires of others as the basis for its actions; it hereby risks caring too little about itself, and may harm itself.

The Masculine probes and crosses boundaries. The Feminine sets and holds boundaries. The Masculine failure mode here is to be too scared that probing boundaries will cause harm. The Feminine failure mode here is to be too scared that setting boundaries will cause harm.

In a solely Masculine world, nobody can trust that their boundaries won't get crossed, and everyone lives in fear of getting hurt. In a solely Feminine world, nobody's boundaries are clarified, and everyone lives in fear of hurting others.

The Masculine resolves problems through solving them. It supports others by giving solutions. It seeks to grant agency. The Feminine resolves problems through sharing and expressing them. It supports others by validating. It seeks to take away the burden of responsibility.

I invite you to hold these definitions side by side, to see how many of these aspects interrelate and inter-cohere. Many traits seem in truth to be different expressions of either of two greater underlying modes. Let us call these modes Divine Masculinity and Divine Femininity.

I encourage you to discover which of these modes is most natural to you; and how far you can reach out, in different contexts, towards either mode. I encourage you to find your comfort zone, and to experiment with exploring whichever side feels most new to you. Play. Discover.

@ElodesNL I like it. It feels similar to the hermetic principle of polarity; in order to have a thing (temperature) there must be hot and cold and now you have two polar sides of the same thing. So it goes with all of your comparisons

@imperialauditor it's power that is legible to others as being power, so they will watch how you use it and treat you accordingly. this is different from feminine power which lies primarily in shaping things such that other people will themselves take certain decisions that you may benefit from

@imperialauditor masculine power has little deniability which means it's got a much larger attack surface. in some areas there exist cultural pressures to reduce deniability around power, e.g. "if you benefit from X, you are complicit in X even if you aren't actively perpetuating it."

@imperialauditor speaking very very broadly: a man who wants things may at some point have to defend them. a woman who wants things may, if skilled and lucky, position herself in such a way that others give her what she wants and will defend those things for her.

@imperialauditor yeah. though uneasy too is the person who culturally must depend on others to fulfill their desires, if they can't find people who will do this. both sides have upsides and downsides. I do think they're meaningfully different roles.

@ElodesNL This picture of calm/still vs intensity is not flying with me The Masculine, when calm and still, is noble, intelligent, piercingly insightful The feminine when still is unconditionally loving, protecting, nurturing, understanding, and WISE