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When I look back on my life, there are a bunch of things that seem suboptimal, but I don't regret: playing video games, daydreaming. That was good, actually. I'd happily do it again. #1 thing I *would* change: I'd have been much more intentional re: the people I associated with
"Really? That's the #1 thing? Not sleep, exercise, diet, reading, writing, learning to code...?" Yeah. I've considered all of those things. And I think changing the people I associated with would've had a bigger impact on all those adjacent variables than the other way around
here's a page from my notebook in 2010 – you can see I was already trying to do most of those typical self-improvement things – but 9 years later, to me, the glaringly obvious omission is that there's no mention of relationships with others. eg "Talk to great people every week" https://t.co/N8ISOo9ryQ
wild thing looking back is, it's not like I needed to do any special or extra work to associate with better people. I was already texting friends and acquaintances all the time, going to hangouts, meetups and social events– I just wasn't intentional about it. I let peers nudge me
even 10+ years ago I think it was pretty clear to me who the best, coolest and most interesting people in my social graph were – & I wasn't making much of an effort to get closer to them. I suppose I felt some sort of loyalty to persist with the group of clowns I had inherited
At any moment, you can choose to KonMari your social graph. Right now, you can go through your texting apps, following lists, FB friends, etc and let go of anybody who doesn't spark joy. And you can identify the top 1% of people in your life & strengthen those relationships
If you're a kind person who's moderately diligent, resourceful and charismatic, next thing you know, those 1% people will be inviting you to places and introducing you to their friends. suddenly, there are dozens of wonderful new people in your life who weren't there before
the above experience smashed limiting beliefs I didn't quite realize I had. I sorta assumed "the people in your life are the people in your life, so it goes." It doesn't have to be that way! Within a couple of years you have a *completely* different life https://t.co/n0FNLJk3pi
some things like family are hard to change, unless you cut ties with them, change your name, leave town, etc – but apart from that, if you live in a city, you can ~radically~ change your entire social graph in abt a year, such that your "entire world" is 95% different than before
^ true to a degree I didn’t fully realize when I wrote it https://t.co/RFK7mIzWxE
me on one of the saddest days of my life vs one of the happiest I carry both of these moments with me every day and yes I had my phone on me both times 😂 thank you technology for helping me document and architect my narrative https://t.co/Fh3vt3qRvt
"meeting magicians is the first step to becoming one." – @utotranslucence https://t.co/z10Xefo51w