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it took me more time than i care to admit to understand which character was intended to be the protagonist in this comic https://t.co/0HJTBJhrac
@eigenrobot I think "my spouse is the only person in the world I'm attracted to" ought to come from a place of honesty, not obligation. If that's how attraction works for you, great. But "I'm attracted to other people, but I'm loyal to my spouse because I love them very much" is also valid.
fwiw this was my original read there are of course (or were? its been a while since i was exposed to the discourse) complaints abt this sort of thing from people who are too Queer to countenance the queerness of women in heterosexual marriage https://t.co/Udm4MVDsrm
example in retrospect my lefty bi ex was always sort of defensive (even to herself) abt dating me, an obviously straight white dude who was into microeconomics, because of the implications for her queer cred and self-identification
further rumination on this phenomenon and time in my life being a bi man or woman and getting heterosexual married in this time and place really was kind of turning ones back on a subcultural norm so i see the original comic as in fact basically defensive https://t.co/BOcg7HXAjr
this framing appears a quarter century before my time in lefty subculture in @sullydish's epoch-making Conservative Case for Gay Marriage, where he notes a gay subcultural view of marriage as _bourgeoise_, which in his mind (and mine) is good, actually, https://t.co/ID8neXg6L7 https://t.co/61pUnL1vUr
another parallel might be the old story (idk anything about how real or prevalent the phenomenon is) of bougie black ppl being accused of Acting White and not Keeping It Real its not an accusation abt "being" white, its abt turning ones back on the revolution, about Selling Out
see also the "gold star" wars, right anyway ppl can identify however they like but the whole phenomenon depicted gives me How Do You Do Fellow Queers vibes and for everyone in the position of the lady in the comic i want you to know Its Okay to Be Bougie the end
@eigenrobot I wonder if there's something about sexuality and marriage in general. Like, if you're married the thing that gives information about you is your spouse/husband more than your sexuality? Sexuality, and especially telling that you're bi feels like a dating thing?