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there's an emotional profile I've seen numerous people navigate but never adequately named, the unbelievably painful hangover that comes after a particular kind of peak experience: 1. lonely dissociated nerd has no life satisfaction, no feelings, no great friends, not engaged at work, lives in a constant state of shutdown for self-protection 2. by some luck they wander into a festival, burn, vibecamp, retreat etc, have the feeling of "I have found my tribe" for the first time in their adult life. extremely high peak experience, re-enchanted with the world, feels that anything is possible 3. returning to everyday life, they soon realise they're incapable of creating the changes required to sustain those good feelings. now they're confronted with the same sorrow & loneliness they've dealt with for years but now WITHOUT the protective forcefield of dissociation 4. extremely bitter brutal agonising dark night of the soul 5.... if that doesn't kill them, then after months or years of trial and error they land on an upward spiral, gradually reorienting their life towards meaningful work, belonging, openness, care for self and others etc, eventually they mature into an exceptionally kind and caring community pillar
if you're an event organiser (if you know how to architect peak experiences like I described here), for godsakes please anticipate the comedown and help your guests navigate it with the minimum horror. this is a solved problem, you just need to design for it. again: talk to me
event design elements that can reduce the comedown: - design for max meaningful relationships eg lots of small group activities - let guests know they should anticipate the crash - encourage them to book friend dates before they leave - offer an online reunion few weeks after
@RichDecibels thats a beautiful example of external events playing into a dark night https://t.co/KlAwRyDtvi
This post articulates perfectly what ive seen for the past ten years from "doofs" (aus speak for large bush gatherings) and my god you are correct sir. Aftercare on the scale of building communities (where everyone feels like theyve "found their tribe") is so important and often overlooked.
@RichDecibels I've been 1, experienced 2 (online too, nonetheless) and feeling into 5. 4 for me seems to be a part of 1 and 3 seems to be less of a step because I'm not overthinking as much / around people who don't let me overthink / curating events with people who've had experiences of 2.
@RichDecibels This is to say that you can go to 2 to 5, but a strong support system and social fabric is highly advised. I also want to make it clear that doubt is also a normal part of the process. If I doubt too little, I might be engaging in self deception.