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hmm i have no way to back this up but ime this sort of "laying down the law" attitude usually comes out of either: A) dealing w someone who never respects boundaries B) having no ability to set up or enforce reasonable boundaries (feels like B is happening here) https://t.co/nTHsH97M9T
like when you dont know how to stick up for yourself or communicate what's important to you, you're a complete doormat until you lose it which is pretty erratic and pisses people off more than if you'd started out by setting reasonable expectations
if you have weak boundaries then people *will* try to take advantage of that (consciously or otherwise) but i suspect doing this erratic, 0-100 boundary-setting thing has the same effect https://t.co/w9VPn77RX6
@goblinodds yeah there's something to say here like, "by the time this has happened, there's a lot else that's happened" this situation is actually not the most interesting part to discuss; it's everything that's happened before
@goblinodds focusing on the AITA moment is kind of like the gender discourse accounts that retweet AITA posts and are like "who do you support 🤪" whereas the relevant thing to building a healthy society is about something totally else: everything that happens before and after