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here's an example I can share publicly; you can see the moment where I flinch in shame & fear of punishment. I do that all the time but in this case I relaxed half a second later https://t.co/Z69uvP70Sk

someone described me as 'disciplined', intending a compliment like focused, competent, driven then it clicked, I'm also 'disciplined' in the sense that in childhood I was trained to have an intense fear of failure the two senses of the word are tightly coupled

@RichDecibels @dkazand I dig it —I get the feeling some people built behaviors out of neural patterns, and others out of combined neural patterns and vasomuscular correctionsThe former seems a lot better… but needs more up-front intentional debugging to get there https://t.co/QOQPcrnrDy