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OPENING SCENE you are small and trying to figure things out. the emotions of the big ones radiate at you loudly and clearly. you can't always put into words what they mean, but you clearly feel in your body what they mean. you hope they treat you well.
sometimes you ask the big ones why they are feeling what they are feeling. they deny the feelings. you are confused. what do you mean daddy isn't sad? what do you mean mommy isn't angry? they insist they aren't. you happen to reconcile the confusion by numbing the loudness
you sense that something isn't right about what the big ones tell you. you're told that there are Rules and they are Important. but the big ones don't follow the rules, and they don't apply The Rules consistently to all the little ones
you surmise The True Rules must be hidden. you try to investigate, but are rebuffed. questions are evaded. you are "annoying" and "pedantic". you "dont get it" some other kids seem to know The True rules, but you can't discern any pattern in how the break the Official Rules
somehow others know how to pay attention to some info stream you can't. they are SYNCED. you are not. sometimes they treat you well, sometimes they don't. this is scary, but you begin to feel The Rules are just unknowable, and try to avoid others for the most part
sometimes their game seems stupid. sometimes it seems brutal and cruel. you're told you "just don't get it" you notice the more they clock you as one of them, the more angry they are when you don't play. you lean into obliviousness.
they can't permit "not wanting to play", so your pass takes the form of a disability exemption. you are "neurodivergent". of course if you could you would, but you can't, poor baby. we must be kind to you despite your affliction