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even if love and compliments are cheap, people who still stick around in your life, help you get groceries, prioritise you over other people are still limited; that stuff is expensive. so it's right for people who associate the first with the latter to be suspicious of it
i call it Casserole friends vs Burning Man friends. the important bit of Casserole friends is not that they like u (it's not even necessary), just that they r around. they live where you live. they fit in your life. they'll bring a casserole when ur sick https://t.co/mOWKomD09I
over time, we can develop the discernment, to know when someone is offering effusive compliments and love, to not lose sight of exactly what we can rely on them for concretely — how well-tested is the bond? how stable do they seem? is there something energetically fucky?
over time, ive begin to simply be more grateful for the kind of people who offer the first, and let it into my heart, while not losing sight of how our Casserole friendship is evolving https://t.co/e9mmOYsfHA
the more stable i feel on my two feet, the more i can appreciate whoever people are and whatever they are offering -Â without trying to habitually lean on them for something my discernment has not found evidence there is for
good point - the importance of discernment is a product of the times before you just had family and childhood community close by and they did it for you. less discernment needed https://t.co/tAjTpToXDB