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🧵 Thread (12 tweets)

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maeby@maebichka• almost 2 years ago

Oh my God oh my God I've had this fear. It's suffocating. Is THIS who my people are? Is this the best I'm going to get? Do I have to compromise and change myself a bit in order not to have to change myself a lot, in order not to be alone and completely misunderstood forever? https://t.co/RRAiq2TjKk

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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• almost 2 years ago

i was so scared that was going to have to be my home, and the communities i sensed i wanted didn't exist

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10/23/2023
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maeby@maebichka• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @not_a_hot_girl

It's possibly worse than being in a world of fargroups, where everyone is so so far off base and wrong for you that there's not even any doubt, you clearly don't belong. the almost-match is what makes you crazy https://t.co/CdbTaGPfa8

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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• almost 2 years ago

my main conclusion from this is the only remarkable thing about "conscious hippies" is that unlike punk music, or boxing, for some reason it wasn't as simple as "ah i don't like that" → "don't think too much about them again" https://t.co/bDotiSSpqA

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10/23/2023
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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @not_a_hot_girl

@not_a_hot_girl IT’S THE ALMOST-MATCH THAT DROVE ME CRAZY

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10/23/2023
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hart the phoenix@puheenix• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @not_a_hot_girl

@not_a_hot_girl oh fuck oh shit. ME TOO. i *did* actually settle into that scene for a couple suffocating years, it was embarrassing. now i get so impatient with that sanctimonious virtuey vibe i want snark, pith, vulgarity, dumbfuckery i want smacktalk and nonsense and absolute silliness

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10/23/2023
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hart the phoenix@puheenix• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @puheenix

@not_a_hot_girl will somebody at the ceremony please make a fart joke

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10/23/2023
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bashu, thanks@bashu_thanks• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @not_a_hot_girl

@not_a_hot_girl just always silently remember that you're a little bit better than them in ways that matter. and then it kind of almost maybe sort of makes up for the fact that they don't understand you or what you truly love in this world

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10/23/2023
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bashu, thanks@bashu_thanks• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @bashu_thanks

@not_a_hot_girl no iam jokes. you deserve to be with people you admire

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10/23/2023
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maeby@maebichka• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @bashu_thanks

@bashu_thanks Stop describing me 😭

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10/23/2023
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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @not_a_hot_girl

@not_a_hot_girl this needs rephrasing, but the thing i found helpful was just taking each community at face value for what it could offer and knowing deeply still all my other needs not met, but still very real

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10/23/2023
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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

@not_a_hot_girl some communities want to ā€œflattenā€ you and for you to not acknowledge other needs, these are the unhelpful, codependent ones that need more grounding to be around some are normal and don’t try to fulfil all your needs, easier to be grounded in

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10/23/2023
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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

@not_a_hot_girl e.g. for first: the ā€œconscious hippiesā€, the indian society e.g. of second: my backyard song circle community, some energy work ones i’m in

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10/23/2023
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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• almost 2 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth

@not_a_hot_girl i’ve felt this a lot too https://t.co/nipucivUiW

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yatharth in asheville@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

i can find friend groups that feel even closer to me but i will never find a friend group that is me because i do not exist within any friend group i exist across them i am a person

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10/23/2023