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Richard D. Bartlett@RichDecibels• about 2 years ago

you can make a mental move to shift the seat of "my inadequacies" out of your self and into your environment, eg replace "I am not courageous" with "my habitat is not encouraging enough"

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Richard D. Bartlett@RichDecibels• about 2 years ago
Replying to @RichDecibels

the benefit of this move is it can give you a path out of self defeating shame. if you're overwhelmed with feelings of inferiority or fundamental wrongness you are very poorly resourced to take steps in a useful direction

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Richard D. Bartlett@RichDecibels• about 2 years ago
Replying to @RichDecibels

similarly it may be useful to believe "development happens spontaneously in the right social context" (most people only make very little headway under their power)

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Richard D. Bartlett@RichDecibels• about 2 years ago
Replying to @RichDecibels

you could of course use this mental move to further entrench your sense of helplessness and resignation, boo hoo, it's not my fault it's the environment waaa I am a giant baby with no agency 😭😭😭 simply don't do this

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Aleksi Liimatainen@aleksil79• about 2 years ago
Replying to @RichDecibels

@RichDecibels any advice on helping someone who has deeply ingrained mental habits that look a lot like this from the outside?

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Aleksi Liimatainen@aleksil79• about 2 years ago
Replying to @aleksil79

@RichDecibels (possibly related to the construction of the world-model by the way it appears in basic causal attribution)

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Richard D. Bartlett@RichDecibels• about 2 years ago
Replying to @aleksil79

@aleksil79 spend time with people who embody the qualities you want to emulate

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Aleksi Liimatainen@aleksil79• about 2 years ago
Replying to @RichDecibels

@RichDecibels let's say they're someone other than the asker, don't indicate explicit motivation for personal growth and have a material impact on things the asker has personal responsibility for

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Aleksi Liimatainen@aleksil79• about 2 years ago
Replying to @aleksil79

@RichDecibels inb4 "spend time with them and embody qualities you'd like them to emulate"

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Richard D. Bartlett@RichDecibels• about 2 years ago
Replying to @aleksil79

@aleksil79 flood of compassion acceptance and curiosity occasionally pointing out the cognitive dissonance in their system, like honestly we can see you're not at your best, and I'm not going anywhere

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