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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

in retrospect, i kind of consider this a hopeless question. it feels so individual, as i get to know my parts created that anxiousness and bringing them them as inner children in myself https://t.co/ZSjRhqRdQo

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

something i’ve always wondered: why are anxiously-attached people attracted to avoidantly-attached people?

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

they were little babies, that thought for very specific reasons we need to make X person come and like me again https://t.co/JJ7v2tSiiM

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

that doesn’t feel as true anymore. those babies get to just be babies and comforted by me and other people get to actually decide if they want to hang out with me

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

if i have to grieve, i will grieve, but the grief doesn’t feel to intolerable it automatically runs my life because all my energy is spent trying to avoid it

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

it’s nice to let other people make that decision, to truly be open to them deciding, “hmmm yes!” or “hmm no!” https://t.co/LhTM51fvV3

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 3 years ago

people-pleasing is a misnomer. it’s actually about pleasing yourself you’re actually trying to desperately please yourself, and it’s based on keeping other people’s reactions within a tiny window

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

there is something like *being open to that* and letting it hit me, in a way where before i would have accepted it, but i wouldn’t really have… let it hit me https://t.co/tz615M4HOr

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• about 3 years ago

not getting what i want and immediately clinically turning that into a plan is not the same as the felt sense of not getting what i want

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

there’s something much slower, more gentler, about letting it hit me. in a way where there is no immediate plan to fix, no urgent sense of what to do, just… disappointment the feeling i spent years avoiding

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

because a no from them doesn’t feel like overwhelm. it doesn’t feel disconnecting me from myself im not trying to recruit them into my avoidance

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

the thing about parts is overwhelm feels like death. feels like mind going blank. there’s no connection to self, only panic there was just a lot of automatic, scary, not having a lot of fun anymore https://t.co/A0DDUvqffD

yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

the part of me that’s very closely monitoring those things isn’t having a lot of fun, and doesn’t wanna do its job anymore, and it was scared of being alone because there was no one home but i’m home a bit more, and it just wants to have fun

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yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 2 years ago

Replying to @AskYatharth

there’s this weird thing that i was told will happen thats happening where i *want* people to live more from their yes and no, the more precious my connection to self feels to me, and the less it feels dependent on other people https://t.co/CCsST1uQUv

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