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because the ground truth of you yourself just existing is too… powerful, and overwhelming. because there is so much loneliness there. and power. and it’s scary to come into your aliveness without 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 that you will have people to support your existence
this is not to exclude the biological and social need for mirroring. but there is the intrinsic belief we carry at a deep level that says i need another to believe that i exist. i need a reflection to know that i fully exist
this is why a simple reflecting statement from a partner can help so much > im angry < you’re angry > yeah! it’s like that “i’m angry” didn’t feel fully allowed… until you saw your partner was totally unfazed, receptive, and happy for you to feel this you could relax
existence, that was previously scared, that it must not find expression — the child you, that did not know, that did not feel fully supported and still loved in expressing all emotions — it can now express more