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2) casual sex is more accepted than ever(?) but people arent really doing it. why not??? is it bc masturbation is also more accepted than ever? asking someone to sleep with you takes some guts and if you have other outlets these are often preferable
seems like being a virgin or never having been in a relationship is becoming less stigmatized? (by necessity?) maybe that pressure was what tipped a lot of people over the edge into making moves rather than staying home?
3) even if virginity and relationship inexperience are less stigmatized, they still present barriers it's easy to feel low-value you dont have the EXP to know what you want dating an inexperienced person is risky (or expected to be less fun)
"dating is scary and all of this is new to me. i dont know what i'm looking for and it's a lot of effort and stress to spend trying to meet people who won't even give me a chance once they figure out i dont know what i'm doing."
i don't want to sound like a luddite but as late as gen x people were stuck meeting each other irl, then they'd call each other on the phone or show up at each other's houses our irl social skills seem to be collectively atrophying https://t.co/Stt2JOvX7V
i think these are correct: https://t.co/IMRvQgo3oM
@goblinodds honestly I think this is all downstream of not going to church church is a matchmaking system of incredible efficency and global reach. bachelor moving to a new congregation is in hot demand, its the opposite experience for non church people
@Paul_Melman @RichDecibels @goblinodds damn https://t.co/FVuLqm9I3r
@goblinodds In college I was completely naïve to people being attracted to me, I ended up only knowing about it because one of my female friends acted as a mediator. "Hey, so-and-so think's you're cute and she's available" kinda thing.
@goblinodds On platforms like tinder/okcupid, the mutual matching system solves that initial ice breaker problem my freind was solving, and also provides a social context and gathering place where that kind of signaling is more obvious.
@goblinodds After my divorce (~10 years), I decided to use dating apps to solve those problems again. Been with current SO for ~8 years. I found her on okcupid before the platform turned into a tinderclone.It didn't hurt that she was new to platform and hadn't been jaded by it yet.
@goblinodds I don't think these dating apps really understand the purpose they are solving well. They instead min-max around growth and user acquisition/profit! Instead of fundamentally solving the match-making and filtering problem that people like my friend were doing in real life.
@goblinodds Tinder uses stuff like swiping and ELO to rank people as matches. This kind of one-dimensional metric seems to be a naive way to go. I think those apps "work" *despite of this* because the app it self acts as Schelling-Point around that signaling problem.
@goblinodds I think this role is where social apps can fill when used to make friends. They tend to be way better at having people migrate to social clades based on interests & activities thru a natural 'chemotaxis' effect. The matchmaking happens organically like how I met my ex at a party.
@goblinodds currently watching a spicy take about how the incentives behind dating apps are fucking shit up.https://t.co/n11JVKFgw6
@goblinodds hahah lmfaoAI all the thingshttps://t.co/qjWbGjFKb6 https://t.co/sdmhTNV4dU
@goblinodds It's a matchmaking problem and that's a problem.https://t.co/65QHGZ1qal
