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the root cause of basically all dating problems is people thinking about themselves, from the inside out: how dating feels for them, what they want, how it fits their story, how they were hurt, how they need to change and improve to get dates, what scares them, etc.

even if you ask people the latter question directly, most are only able to talk about themselves https://t.co/YziCEatKnr

everything I've written about dating, from hacking the algorithm to selfless dating and modeling others to the game theory of OkCupid to gender ratios and dating norms is about getting out of your own POV and understanding the other people, the ones you're trying to date

but I feel that somehow this never comes through. people read my stuff as being about themselves first and foremost. if I wrote a book of all my dating advice called "it's not about you" no one would get it am I wrong about this? are people capable of getting this message?

@forshaper huge thing for careers. everyone's obsessed with what work they want to do and how and what it means about them. but if you simply understand what people with money need and will pay for it's not that hard to find something you can offer and will like doing