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growing tendrils of agency is pointing myself at the bottlenecks in ability, and learning to act into said domain fluently it's easier to concieve of fluency for things like bicycles, instruments, and languages. i want a fluent capcity to act in more abstract domains
rn I don't have a fluency with money. lots of the movements are jerky, i'm undecided and uncertain about how i want to make many types of decisions, and when i have an intention my will cannot easily flow through the parts of reality that need to be wiggled with money
Find People to Learn From i don't have to do it all alone! there's people who know lots about shit I care about! i did not think that was the case for a long while! or, i thought there wasn't a path to spend time with them. i want to find people i respect and admire and SPONGE
Prepare to Be Lucky taking @visakanv seriously on sharpening and brightening my vision to the point where i could actually pounce on an oppurtunity to share it with people who are more capable of mustering the material/social resources to make it happen
i'm more convinced that "people care about things, and if I can present a clear illustration on how i want to do something that furthers that care, we'd be naturally moved to collab" also more convinced that i can track what i care about, and articulate it (work in progress)
this is an interesting flip from something i used to feel! previously, I'd had a conception that you could "find a rich person and sell them an impressive idea", but it always felt framed as... scamming them? pulling one over on them? passing a test that was bullshit?
and so considering this option always felt like a tension between "it would be dope to get Funding from Big People, but man it sure would be icky/corrosive to do what would be needed" now there's a sense of "oh yeah.... its just... possible to do/create stuff that people value"
Motive Force In All Things is about moving deeper into fractal conviction and doing what i want with the full strength of my being, in a way that is more akin to Surfing the Giant Wave That is Me, rather than pushing the Giant Boulder That is Me up a hill
yeah, like the BIGGEST reason i don't intend to "force myself" to do things is that frame asserts that i (and humans) am this inert thing that doesn't move on it's own and needs to be manhandled by this other symbolic "me" and honestly that's the fakest shit i've ever smelt
Make the World Real is like tendrils of agency, but less focused on immediate bottlenecks of my life, and more about grounding my knowledge and understanding of what the fuck is everything. I want a meta-fluency of being able to hone in on where my understanding is ungrounded
this DOESN'T mean i need maximal conviction in everything or GTFO, it's more like... I want to be razor clear of what knowing is of what kind. Are the only refs I have for how the UN works a symbolic word salad? cool, in that word salad might be a hint that could inform/
@natural_hazard @visakanv @ollyrobot https://t.co/lyFGiyAbq0