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strangely in the middle of making a thread and drinking coffee I suddenly feel like crying about the tiny gap between my life now and the life I want to live (reading and taking notes and being a huge nerd). It’s such a small gap– I’m practically there already – and yet

several things going on I think one is that I’m thinking about people who misunderstand me and my motivations etc– but really the true tragedy is how that then leads to me partially misunderstanding myself, doubting and second-guessing myself

I am so, so, so earnest about what I do. All the evidence is right there. But then some random asshat comes along and insults me because he’s projecting his own insecurities at me, and my thing is that I’m so agreeable I take his frame seriously, which throws me off my game https://t.co/JEXrf9fyYk

at dinner yesterday I found myself saying – on the Internet, you can scroll past thousands of people before you find one who seems truly serious and earnest about their work, and when you find people like that, you try to stay in touch https://t.co/GmxZCEPQwG

all I ever wanted to do was to love the world and be loved in return, but apparently you can’t do this without also getting kicked in the face [spits blood] I’m not dead, and I’m not quitting https://t.co/DdnKpvKN61

if you think you can discourage me with words on the Internet any harder than life has fucked with me over 20 years I absolutely welcome you to try https://t.co/8tyiOxtz2Y