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Inspired by a Lifetime of Ignoring My Instincts Because They Didn’t Make Sense Or Weren’t What I “Really” Wanted and then wondering why I felt missingness and not real! https://t.co/qVVoGDWT8D

Instrincts are how I know who I am, because they already are me, and already what I know. https://t.co/58vyqEmSoV

The Emotional TRUTH of the situation. The KNOWING of my dissonance. The ALREADY EXISTING nature of my feelings. The bringing to light the POSITION I am already in, conscious or not. The disgusting FELT EXPERIENCE of the world even if it doesn’t feel right. All these make me.

It is not that my instincts are correct. It’s that they define correct, who I hope to be and what I want to do in the moment. It’s strange, to serve an objection function constantly in flux. That’s the nature of surfing our wants.

@AskYatharth yaaas, instinct-followers unite 💕 much warmth to you. after I clawed back from a near-death xp on a startling truth that "I can't die! I haven't even lived yet!!" I now...rlly think that not-following-instinct is "already soul death." & like, we're alive. so let's be alive 💕

@AskYatharth also, re: peril: yes. our cultural tendency to ignore our instincts is a public health crisis. tw suicide - in the limiting case, the emptiness leads to suicidal urges, because you're already more husk than human & haven't grieved enough do to the soul-reset.

@AskYatharth this view's too bold to be 100% my own! I saw it in some lit I trust, and fit it together with my near-death xp and was like...oh. that clicks, and explains a lot. the veil between life and death is more fungible than I thought. away-from-instinct = "somehow already dead" 🤔🙏💕

@relic_radiation I don’t talk about it publicly, because people have very different experiences with it, but very much “congruent depression” and allowing myself to die when my life no longer feels worth living have been deeply important practices for me.

@relic_radiation You might like this thread on finding the sense of instinct back in lives privileged enough to know we’ll have food. https://t.co/3PsEf1QTJi

@relic_radiation Also this one on finding the oomph of reality back. https://t.co/OdbigHhzuW

Does posting this have an oomph to it? Not quite. It’s starting to. This is already real. I feel I have waited all my life for this moment to step inside the house as people say, “Welcome.” Welcome to a world that feels real, and experiences and actions have that oomph to them