Surrender is different from throwing yourself under the bus.
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2/9/2021
yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth
To surrender myself to the feminine having thrown my masculine under the bus is to not surrender at all—it’s to prostrate.
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2/9/2021
yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth
I didn’t kno what I was doing. For the longest while I prostrated. Constantly defined by the periphery. Disowning a part of myself I could not bring over.
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2/9/2021
yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth
I was willing to throw myself under the bus just to gain entry, but what use is an open door if can’t bring over all of me?
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2/9/2021
yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth
I was willing to cut off the hand that was STEM, chop off the head that was doing-heavy, if it meant no longer could anyone look at me and say, “Ah, there is something that will not fit.”
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2/9/2021
yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth
I bring over all of me. I let it be changed. But I do not disrespect it. It was still me.
To surrender to change, I bring myself to change. I do not shove it under a bus. I do not pack it in my bag.
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2/9/2021
yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth
Maybe it hurts. Maybe it won’t. By that point, I’ll have stopped understanding what hurt means at all.
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2/9/2021
yatharth ༺༒༻@AskYatharth• over 4 years ago
Replying to @AskYatharth
My urge to prose is clearly not matched by my willingness to be cringe.
