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So much of my human experience in relating, I had to learn and articulate, and grasp it in a way I could kno . . . https://t.co/CT1BDjd1YD
@xuenay It took me conceptually grasping what conversations *are* and I could name what felt like my favourite *in the moment* arbitrarily and the world wouldn’t somehow explode for me to get to the other side. I didn't kno what was going on, and no one told me. https://t.co/kkDYqEGbP1
And after that, I didn’t need it so much, but it is cruel to think people should get something in a way their system hasn’t equipped them to safely know. Be kind. https://t.co/HP3LjWAaac
Making someone let go of something their system still considers it important to hold on to is like trying to invite them onto the fun carousel by grabbing their hand when they’re not moving. One of the other of you is going to get hurt.
Get them moving up alongside you first. Co-entrain. Like trains trying to hitch together, you want to match vibes first. https://t.co/I2XTZPslzB
yeah, there’s something about “you deserve an explanation” or “there may be no such thing as deserving. but this might actually work, and lead you to fullness” where before the charioteer was trying to suppress itself. impossible and not fun https://t.co/ExTGt1wf3C
1/ Do you have an overactive charioteer (ie executive control)? I do. His grip on the reins is too tight. Not enough wiggle room for the rest of my mind.For the past few years, I've yelled at him: "Loosen up on the reins!" "Be more embodied!" "Allow yourself to feel!"... https://t.co/1Mw0BU9Ldw
You know what happens when you try to bitch-slap someone into getting something? They might even get it, but more times than not, they’ll steel-grip, clenched-teeth down the drink and partially get it and have more trauma from disrespecting their system later. Buy-in matters.
You sure as heck won’t deliver them the gift of trusting their own coherence, that’s for sure. https://t.co/EdpfpRiaRt
The Emotional TRUTH of the situation. The KNOWING of my dissonance. The ALREADY EXISTING nature of my feelings. The bringing to light the POSITION I am already in, conscious or not. The disgusting FELT EXPERIENCE of the world even if it doesn’t feel right. All these make me.
The nuance is that sometimes some people (Kraye) did Zen-slap me into the face into getting something, and it didn’t change me, but it laid the foundation for me getting it months later. https://t.co/g1xuzDQMeW
A lot of people told me to “just do it” and I didn’t feel sure if I should and a lot of my project has been helping people know what to expect so that they can know to do it. https://t.co/oQVzOuK1To
It will still be just as scary as before, but this time you'll know to expect it. You won't be as confused. It'll be okay. Helping people “just do it,” including bypassing their own trust mechanisms, without bypassing their trust mechanisms. https://t.co/dRvg6CCXf6
That last line sounds like a paradox. What I mean is— Our trust function can hold us back. Like a traumatized captain that doesn't allow any actions. A lot of progress is overturning that captain and realizing you don't have to be scared of the same things you were scared of.