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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago

Conor gave me the topic elders to thread about 👵👴 https://t.co/dlWaQKQxA4

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Per his "as many as you can in hour" instruction, I wrote these out rapid-fire in a journal over an hour on a plane from SFO to ATL Sunday I share here the unedited results

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Elders: seek out mentees and proteges

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Youngsters: seek out elders

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Even (or maybe especially) brilliant and/or visionary elders are lonely, not understood, and in need of curious energetic folks to explore their minds and work

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Old folks need help, help them

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Twice I've sought out specific elders to learn from, twice my expectations were blown away by the friendships that came of it

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Elders are just folks too, same needs and desires with a bit more experience

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

The West is really shooting itself in the foot with the cultural norms around elder care and not having intergenerational households

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

What are elders?

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Where are elders?

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Call your grandparents if you can

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

In a discussion on how to share and pass knowledge as part of the @_buildingbeauty seminar, an anecdote was shared about an Indian village with a non-pedagogical concept of knowledge transfer:

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

an elder craftsman, when asked if he was worried his knowledge would die with him, said "All my knowledge came to me in a dream. When it is time for another to know, the same will happen."

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Any sort of explicit mentorship platform will not capture the true gems, but instead capture the kind of folks who think they'll make good mentors (some of which are correct)

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

You'll learn more from your elders in conversation about the mundane or banal than from discussing their accomplishments

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Spend some time with elderly folks to really appreciate your body

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Old people have thought of way more dirty jokes than you have

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

As inhibitions lessen in old age, you can get the most raw and refreshing commentary from your elders informed by many years of dealing with bullshit

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

You will get old

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

What sort of elder would like to be?

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Elders: make it known you're open to young folks reaching out and engaging with you. It can be intimidating, you can seem alien to young people who don't know how to relate, but your attention can change lives so easily

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Young folks: Don't hesitate! Reach out to folks you admire and see if they need help or are just willing to talk (they probably do and probably are)

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Talk to old ladies in line at the store, never not great

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

In the West is seems we get our elder fix in form of politicians and celebrities: look local. That old guy who mows his lawn everyday, the ladies who sit and talk in the park. Say hello. They're your people and you are their legacy.

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Elders don't need to be mentors, or coaches, or idols or heroes, just people who have seen some shit

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

You are allowed to disagree with the elderly

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

To engage with specific knowledge or subject matter you'll need to seek specific elders/mentors, but to engage with personal and interpersonal knowledge and wisdom almost anyone will do: 70 years of being a monkey with clothes on gives insight, you can't help it

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Ask to record oral history interviews, and just ask them to start with their birth, then surf the contours of the convo and see where it goes. Simple as. Some will just pour their history out, some with need coaxing

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

seriously you won't regret recording: https://t.co/yGOesJ6El3

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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 5 years ago

Every person I mentioned my mission to was so supportive, the most common response: "I wish I had done that." I felt more and more strongly this was an important task I had set for myself ❤️

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Same rule applies to elders as everyone: if you want to keep their attention, talk about what interests them. But I think you'll often find that your life interests them too

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Old folks often have little patience for wasting their time but lots of time if you're not wasting it

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Get on Nextdoor and start offering help. If you know there are some older folks in your neighborhood, check in on them and see if they need anything (even just company sometimes)

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Elderly bodies can be very fragile and clumsy, but their minds usually are not. This can be massively frustrating to them. Keep this in mind.

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Walk as slow as they need to

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

CALL YOUR GRANDMA

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

https://t.co/90RuLGRYWm

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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisalmost 6 years ago

My grandma is 🔥 https://t.co/1JnInMTwRv

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Instead of "What was it like?" (which can be answered by any one of a certain age and usually by a Google search) ask "What were you like?" or "How did you spend your time?" or "Who were your high school crushes?"

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

The bar for making a person's week is so low: being friendly and polite is enough often. For old folks this is doubly so, they are often ignored and quite lonely.

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

The state should be run by young men and old women

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Record their voices telling their stories

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Seriously: my mom has hours of her mom talking about her life recorded because of me and holy shit am I glad of that

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Respect and consult with elders but do not idolize or give undue credence: awe prevents communication

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Old folks know they are going to die, don't infantilize them by pretending differently or avoiding the subject.

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

If you practice a particular healing modality, craft, or art, aggressively seek out the elders of that tradition to understand your lineage and deepen your practice.

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Not all elders are nice, not all elders are wise, but they ARE superdense embodied experience

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Don't only talk to successful elders

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

If you're getting into a field or topic and reach out to an elder in the space, they've almost certainly bashed their heads against all the same stuff you are. Instead of asking questions at the frontier of your knowledge, ask what they wish they hadn't wasted their time on.

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

A lifetime dealing with the mental and physical constraints of being a human in the world produces a depth of pro tips and hacks: these are often clever af and worth noticing

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

If you're in tech and want to discover your product's pain points and frustrations, test with the elderly, they'll be amplified

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

The world is changing faster and faster, so old folks can seem out of touch, but some parts of life are universal: career advice from Gramps might not hold up, but romantic advice may very well

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Elders have screwed up 10x more times than you've ever even tried

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Advice from elders should be taken (like all advice) in the context of the giver. The thing about elders is that there is A LOT of giver context, so advice can be super richly textured

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

Call your grandma, she wants to hear from you

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12/23/2020
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james, the giant peach@JimmyRisover 4 years ago
Replying to @JimmyRis

end :)

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12/23/2020