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A thing that would make me more powerful if I understood it better: it’s hard for me to tell when people are abusing themselves for fun, vs abusing themselves in a way they don’t want It’s complex and multifaceted bla bla, but also, being able to tell one way or the other is 🔥
Consider the failure modes - someone is enjoying a cigarette or a bad movie and joking about how terrible it is, while their internal consensus + extrapolated trajectory is; they’re gonna smoke and watch trash till they die. The optimal interaction strategy depends on your goal
Effective way to not make mistakes is to avoid all interventions, avoid having or committing to any opinions, second-guess all your utterances... it’s also an effective way to imprison yourself and have a cursed life. Aaand hardly anybody enjoys your company except narcissists 💀
@visakanv Do you and @spacecrone follow each other because I feel like you'd enjoy each other's thoughts. All the interesting people are musing on this right now: how much of yourself is it reasonable to negate for the comfort of others? How often? What are the exceptions? etc.
A simple + effective lvl 1 strategy that probably works most of the time, tit for tat style, is “ask people what they want + give it to them”. If they’re falsifying preferences (to both you and themselves), so be it - over time you build a network of honest people. Simple & good
this probably goes a much longer way than I realized before thinking abt it. The high-functioning version of this requires being earnest but not pushy, interested but not obsessive. Creating space, sending the invite, and being outcome-independent Still,, what about shitposting
I am v serious about my shitposting 😂 i think there’s a failure mode of over-earnestness; it’s exhausting for me to be around people who are over-optimised. There is a deep tragic-comic element to existence itself, and it runs through everything, including/especially all of this
But some people use their shitposting as an avoidance mechanism, to avoid facing things (themselves, their friends, the world). Das not good, frens Some people use their eager/earnest steamroller to avoid facing things. Das not good either frens
Circling back to the start, maybe I don’t actually need to know, and maybe knowing is not entirely possible, even desirable. Maybe I just need to be. And even that is not something that is “necessary” or “required”, but it seems like a nice and good way to live
@visakanv This related early @existentialcoms strip produced a profound insight for me related to internal conflict. Not sure I can articulate that insight—it was more embodied than conceptual. My tip is to seek a way to transcend the argument in this comic: https://t.co/UhYlOp8Rpy https://t.co/eSmeiiOuu9
