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Huh, came across questions I had 10 months ago and now I have a new clue towards an answer! @visakanv https://t.co/nymJgd1H6V
@visakanv And why does this happen? I kind of get why the wrongness thing - punishment. But why have I developed a habit of feeling angry/frustrated instead of feeling the underlying grief? It *consistently* feels better to grieve than to seethe.
I still don't understand the full structure, but one thing I've learned in the meantime from reading McGilchrist's book on the @divided_brain is that: A) most emotions (grief for sure) are mostly based in RightHem B) anger is based in LHem C) grasping for need to control is LHem
So from the left hemisphere's perspective, it can maintain its sense of control by feeling anger rather than grief. And having this control matters to it a lot. A well-integrated brain isn't subject to this need for control, but can hold it as part of a larger picture.
But, as McGilchrist points out, most people in the modern western world don't have well-integrated brains! 🧠 Our left hemispheres have taken over in a certain ways, and the result is the identification with this need for control & certainty & being right: hence, anger.
I'm valuing, in this moment, that even as I feel a deepened sense of understanding here, I also feel aware of how much I still don't know. (This too is a hemispheres thing.) https://t.co/MriWMW7w6h
Oh and another thought: Kübler-Ross' 5 Stages of Grief seem to also involve a left→right hemisphere shift! Denial - very very left-hemisphere. Anger - also left-hemisphere Bargaining - ?? Depression - right awakens, left collapsed Acceptance - right, w/ left integrated https://t.co/Cl5fKaTqsp
(And! Lots of complexity in details of the actual *relationships* between the hemispheres... and I don't really understand this at all! I'm just reaching that chapter in the book, and I'm guessing even after I've read it I'll still feel like we really don't know yet!)