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I’ve blocked about 12 followers out of 8,000+ in 10 years on Twitter. Not counting bots or comically malicious people, but real people who were following me and even said nice and supportive things to/about me. It’s never a pleasant or fun thing to do and I think about it *a lot* https://t.co/MlQRpXIGJ4
Near the core of my personality are ideas like “you should be willing to listen to anybody, especially people who are critical, people who disagree with you” and “you shouldn’t let challenges go unanswered”. I’ve been forced to be more precise about these over the years https://t.co/HccFcuuqpr
More context: someone can tell me that I suck and I’ll see it as an invitation to a discussion that I can hopefully learn something from. I have always been like this https://t.co/9qvKQhYw1h
But here’s the thing though - those dozen or so people have collectively wasted probably over a month of my time now, with very little to show for it. If time weren’t precious I probably wouldn’t care, but time *is* precious and opportunity cost is real https://t.co/vEyaIABl96
If I had the time, I would happily argue with every single person about every single thing until *they* collapse from exhaustion. Unfortunately time is limited, so time arguing with idiots is time not spent with my wife, who is a lot more fun & interesting & deserving of my time https://t.co/XfIMltAHmU
Yes!! It’s crazy to look back on the sheer volume of time and headspace these people can extract from you in the guise of being almost-good-faith actors. On retrospect I cherish the assholes who saved me the trouble. https://t.co/9hW1GKb017
There have been multiple occasions where my beloved wife is trying to spend time with me, and she finds me staring intently into my phone, trying to explain myself to an internet acquaintance who is hell-bent on wasting my time as a participant in a drama they hallucinated at me https://t.co/8FRTEF8XKU
I have a soft spot for the belligerent, disagreeable people of the world who have strong feelings & intuitions. I really do. I was one of them. But I can’t give them more space in my life than my own wife. And if we have kids? “Daddy spends his time arguing on the internet” https://t.co/RumAuTGJqs
And the thing is - I know these particular folks weren’t *trying* to waste my time. They were usually just engaging with me the only way they know how. But these over-enthusiastic people can drag you into the sea and drown you without any malicious intent https://t.co/jfm2ws3VPT
“How do you connect and engage [...] without getting drawn into other’s struggles in such a way that your time and energy are compromised?” https://t.co/xw8ynQWotp
update 6 years later https://t.co/xwR2fIcNQR
a shift i've been going through over the past... decade, almost, but it's really increased in the last couple of years, is that i now rarely bother to try to get into alignment with ppl who respond to me in misaligned ways. what this means is i ignore them instead of disagreeing