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Dudes will say #notallmen to women rather than #stopthatshit to shitty dudes, because “average” dudes benefit from the shittiness of the worst dudes. The presence of trash in the marketplace makes mediocrity seem like more of a bargain. “At least my man doesn’t beat me” https://t.co/n3gwmiqyGT
For nuance: dudes in aggregate (not each & every dude) say #notallmen in aggregate more than they say #stopthatshit in aggregate. By easily 1-2 orders of magnitude. Exceptions are everywhere (congrats if you are one, good job) but their existence does not prevent this phenomenon
Taking real action to make a real difference is harder and scarier and more costly https://t.co/YNFBXiGE53
@visakanv Maybe I’m misinterpreting this but—is it really all men’s responsibility to police the behavior of predatory men (rather than just a human duty to protect the weak)? Is this different from chastising Muslims who aren’t publicly and vocally opposed to Muslim terrorists?
@cesca_specs I’m not looking to chastise anybody; I’m just looking to properly understand the systems of incentives that influence human behaviour. If people feel inspired to step up and take more responsibility that would be a cool side-benefit. If people feel more chastise-y that’s a bummer
@visakanv Haha, I think I just get hashtag-triggered when I see this topic and start making assumptions. (I’d like to see more talk in general of things men *and women* can do. Feels like the discourse on sexual harassment is all about treating us with kid gloves.)
More nuance. This is really a statement about the economics - the costs and benefits of behavior, and how incentives shape that. Not looking to condemn or moralize here https://t.co/ZGbsA81n37
btw a common joke in Singapore (I don't know if it's universal) – if a dude does something uncommonly romantic or thoughtful, a common response from other dudes is "wah, spoil market leh". It's a joke, yes, and jokes serve a social purpose + sustain a social order https://t.co/uZQcUkMrLT
